GBS

Assalamualaikum peeps

Long time no see. 

Recently i witness another baby passed away because of GBS Sepsis. It is so heartbreaking seeing the mother holding her lifeless baby. 

I stifled my cry when seeing the mom and dad broke down when my speacialist broke the bad news - there is nothing more that we can do to your baby, we have tried our best but he seems not responding to our treatment. 

GBS is so nasty, this is my second time seeing baby passed away within 24 hours of life because of GBS. I wish i can do more for the baby, but he deteriorates so fast. 

Bayangkan you are so excited carrying your baby for 9 months thinking there is nothing wrong only to loose them within hours after their birth. 

This is the hardest thing in this job, when you loose your patient and you felt hopeless, hoping you can do better for them and their families. But i had to remind myself again and again that it is all God’s plan, and i can only try my best.

But it is still hard when you have to put a front in front of parents and your colleague. 

There are a few deaths that i still remember after few years passed, in which sometimes i was wondering how are the parents now. I still remember the mothers’ hopeful face everytime when they asked their baby’s/child’s condition. It sucks when they kept on thanking me for taking care of their child but i know deep down, their child is not gonna make it despite our best effort. 

:(

Reading my old post

I am glad i wrote a lot in this blog during my late teen and early 20s. 

Somehow i am missing that stage of life. When i was young, and my main problems in life were mainly things related to my feelings and how hard studying medicine. Haha. 

Adulting is hard. 

I am thirty years old this year. 

Cepat sangat masa berjalan.

When i was young, i thought by this age, my life would already be figured out. Haha, my god i was so naive back then.

Sometimes, i felt like i am more lost nowadays compared to when i was younger. 

Hmm, thats all peeps. Its nice writing here again after so long. 

Bye for now :)

2020

Asslamualaikum :)

Happy 2020 peeps, 

Aaa banyaknya habuk dekat blog ni

Kesian dia lama dah tak dilawati.

Have a lot of things to write 

But so little time

I should write more often

Seronok tau bile free2 scroll balik post lama lama walaupun certain post quite embarrassing

Sometime i write in my phone notes

Should upload those memos sometimes

K lah bye

Actually bukak blg ni tadi because nak try my new keyboard :D

Till then bye1

Buntei

Assalamualaikum wbt :)

We have a cat at home named Buntei.
He is a very manja boi. And penakut also.
Mak used to hate cats a lot, cause stray cats used to berak on her plants.

But adik insisted on having one as a pet. And then came Buntei in our life.
Initially adik named him as Tiger but mak called him Buntei. I guess he is kucing kampung after all, Tiger never sticks around and he reponds only when we call him Buntei.

Now adik dah masuk belajar, and Buntei remain in our house. Mak said dah bela lama jadi sayang pulak.

Lol.

She used to hate cats so much but now she’s the one who taking care of Buntei.
She loves Buntei as she said since Buntei is in the house there are less cockroaches and lizards.

Okay tu je. I tuink the hate to love story between mak and Buntei so cute.
Till then bye.

Btw i am entering Emergency department next week as my last posting. Wow time sure flies, i am already a sixth poster ☺️